Apt. 11D

Setting Up the House

Today is a house day. I've let the laundry pile up to unacceptable levels, but I'm going to have to deal with washing machine problem first. There's a puddle of water in front of the washing machine. Some tube must be diconnected. That's my technical assessment. It's a tube problem. 

My in-laws are coming at the end of the month, so I need to buy a daybed today. I need curtains of the office/guest room. Lots of chores. So, I will only talk about house and home crap today.

I have a love-hate relationship with house stuff. I'll binge on home improvements for a month, but then feel shallow and can't think about it for another six months. Then I'll buy a house porn magazine, start dreaming about paint colors, and become obsessed with home decor all over again. It's a healthy cycle of self-hatred! 

Here's what our living room looked like before we moved in. 

Lots of furniture. A striped awning in front of the house, which made the room very shady and was bizarre on a split level. Low hanging art work, which made the room look very short. 

The finish on the floors had turned orange and was full of scratches.

Flowered wallpaper in the entrance way. 

After the people moved out, we had the floors redone. 

Later, I pulled that valence off the window. It looked like a big eye lid. 

I bought curtains. 

I put some random stuff on the mantel of the fireplace. 

We haven't bought any new furniture. Just arranged what we had already. I would like a new coffee table to replace the IKEA cardboard thing. We painted the walls of the living room White Dove and carried that color throughout the downstairs. The entrance way is a blue and the door is a forest green. 

By putting the sofa like this, we maximized the view from the picture window and created a larger entrance area. 

This wall needs large art. My dream for this room is push up the ceiling through the attic and create a paneled, angled ceiling. 

In the Yard

It's been unseasonably warm out here in New Jersey. Sad for the polar bears, but good for me. Steve and I spent the whole weekend outside doing yardwork.

The previous owners had landscapers who did the basics, but that was about it. All the shrubbery is over grown. Leaves are trapped under everything. There's way too much English ivy snaking its way up the pine trees. Two full cords of wood are rotting in the center of the backyard. It all needs to get cleared out. 

 

While there's plenty of land in the front of the house. It's shady and at a corner. We can't do much with it. The prime real estate of the yard - the zone for grilling and chilling -- is quite small. Only 12 feet deep. The patio is crumbling. I don't think the previous owners used the backyard at all and, instead created a shade garden for the birds. And the rats who chowed down on all the bird seed. It's hard to drink beer in an alley full of annoying shrubbery and rats. 

We pulled out about ten of the shrubs yesterday. More still needs to get chopped. 

 

The good thing about yard work is that killing old shrubbery is cheap. Clippers and a saw. We probably need to rebuild the crumbling patio. That won't be cheap. But we can probably put that off for a year or two. We also need to plant a few new shrubs to help cover up the Taj Mahal that our neighorbors built around their pool, but I haven't decided what will go in and where it will go. I need to cut everything down before I decide what to put in. 

I am in the midst of writing a very serious piece right now about neighborhoods, so I'm only going to write silly stuff on Apt. 11D today. 

Gift Guide 2011 #4: Fireplace Edition

Behind the kitchen and the dining room, we have a TV room. It was probably once a porch that the former owners closed in. When we bought the house, our real estate agent in her never-quite-left-the-Bronx accent told us, "Laura, you'll take out the stove and put in a sectional sofa on that back wall. And then paint everything white."

We are going to paint the room white next week (and get proper chairs), but the stove is staying. My husband the Eagle Scout is having way too much fun building fires. We also have a fireplace in the living room, so we're in fire heaven. After Halloween's freak storm, Steve ran around the neighborhood stealing branches off the neighbors' yards. 

Showing you where our priorities are, our first purchases for the new house were equipment for the living room fireplace: Crate and Barrel's Fireplace Screen and tool set. On a whim, we also got a fireplace candleabra, which actually sits in the middle of our large picture window. Some nights, I light the candles, so Steve can see our house on his walk home from the bus stop. 

After reading this article about a Finnish house full of wood burning fireplaces, Steve and I are now in love with Jotul stoves. Maybe next year. We need more equipment, like a storage bin and a log tote. 

Along with the light coming from the fireplaces, we love decorating with lots of candles and string lights and paper lanterns for the holidays. You'll be able to see our house from space. 

Modernizing Mid-Century

The previous owners of our new house were in their mid-80s. The woman, known as Bix, felt that they needed to move to one of those graduated old age homes where you are moved to apartments with more helpers, as you gradually fall apart. Ludlow, the husband, wasn't too happy about that. But Bix insisted. 

Ludlow and Bix were waspy types who lived in this community since it went up in 1960. He was a Harvard educated lawyer. Probably with a combination of old and new money, they did quite well for themselves and, by the time they moved on to the old age home, they owned several homes. Bix was a traditional housewife for the most part. The house is traditionally girlie, but she had an bohemian edge. The basement was devoted to her art and she put in sky lights and drying racks everywhere. 

While these eccentric old folks are amusing enough, we really do need to update this house. And we need to do it very cheaply. Here's the kitchen:

As much as I would love to rip out these old cabinets and fading tile, we're stuck with it for a while.  God, I hate that tile countertop. And there's a black oven, a white fridge, and a stainless steve stove. People, you must pick one finish on your appliances and stick with it. 

Get a closer look at the wallpaper border in this room. 

Nice, huh? Bix really loved wallpaper. Here's what I'll be peeling off the walls for the next three years. 

 

The fish wallpaper border is in the bathroom, because fish, water, bathroom, water. GET IT? 

The first project is going to be the kitchen. I'll peel off the wallpaper, paint the walls a green-based white to neutralize all that orange, and then add some black hardware. 

Weekend Journal - Moving Edition (Part Two)

Two days later, we received our first offer on the house. It was a low ball offer, especially since we had already lowered our price twice and for a considerable amount. But the worst part was that they wanted us out in four weeks. The family had relocated for business and the woman in the black SUV was living in a hotel for $5,000 per month with two kids, while her husband was out of town on business. 

Four weeks is an extremely tight turn around in normal times. It was an impossibility in our case, because we didn't have a house that we wanted. In fact, we had only really looked at four houses so far. Our agent hadn't shown us houses, because she didn't think our house would sell. I had spent hours every day looking at houses online, but not actual, real houses. 

So, now we had an offer on the table. The thought of selling the house and having no place to go -- homeless with two children -- made me vomit. The agent played hardball with the buyer. We went back and forth on the price and went up to a reasonable number. The move-in date was pushed back by two weeks. The new date was August 26th.

We signed a contract, after the agent assured us that the contract wasn't legally binding until after attorney review. (It took hours for the agent to convince Steve that this was kosher.) We would stall on the attorney review for three days to give us time to find a house. She said that we would spend all day Saturday looking at houses, until we found something suitable to move into. 

After she left the house with the contracts in hand, Steve and I privately agreed that Saturday was D Day. If we found a house, then we would move. If we didn't find a house, then the Era of Prolonged Misery would end; we would take the house off the market.

I estimated that there was a 5 percent chance that we would find a house in one day. 

Why Not More Zoning?

Out here in Jersey, people love to announce their wealth by the creative usage of Greek columns on their homes. Also marble fountains, circular driveways, and statues of David. Preferably that's all happening at the same time on one home.  That's how we roll out here. These are MY people. 

So, it was a bit jarring to pull onto Cape Cod and see nothing but tasteful shingles, short homes, and gardens. Where are the cathedral ceilings, man? 

Either there are no Italians on the Cape or they have really good zoning laws. 

I'm going with the good zoning laws. So, why don't more towns have these strict zoning laws that mandate that an area should have a uniform look? Wouldn't that increase the property values of a town? 

Aluminum Siding: Effective as an Old Fashioned Tin Foil Hat?

We're ten comments into my post on home improvements and the discussion has turned to a debate about the potential of aluminum siding to offer more protection from  CIA probes than your old-fashioned, standard tin foil hat. 

Home Improvement 101

Amy P sent me a link to a blog post about DIY projects. After working for 6-1/2 years fixing up an old house and contemplating buying another DIY house, we have a lot of experience on these matters. Let me give you some advice.

I'm defining a DIY house as a house that has been owned by a granny who hasn't fixed anything in thirty years. We're talking old bathrooms, old kitchen, yucky wallpaper, yucky carpeting, possibly an old roof, ancient electricity, and an over grown yard. Why would anyone buy such a house? We would.

1. Why a DIY house is a good thing.

DIY houses are cheap. Most people look at stained wallpaper and do a U-turn out of the house. I like a bargain and I know how much it costs to fix things up, so it means that I can get a bigger house and a bigger yard for a cheaper price. 

A DIY house, especially one that was built pre-war, was built by people who knew what they were doing. It will be solidly built and have spacious rooms. It will have cool details that are impossible to replicate today. 

I prefer an older, bigger home to a newer, small home. We're looking at a lot of teeny houses, where the real estate agents promise us that we can put on a family room extension on the back. I hate those houses, because I've seen so many bad extensions that were put up without the help of an architect. Also, you lose your backyard with an extension. Steve and I love to garden, so the backyard is important to us. 

2. Why a DIY house is a bad thing. 

You have to ask yourself why a contractor didn't already snap that house up for a quick flip. Is there something terribly wrong with the place? Is it in a terrible location? A lot of older homes are built on busy streets or are too close to the town dump. If the location is bad, you'll have a hard time reselling the house later. You also will have to deal with traffic and the smells from the dump. Before you buy a DIY, you should spend a lot of time on Zillow looking at home prices on the street and hidden industrial areas. You never want to have the most expensive house on the block, so estimate the costs of rehabbing the place + the current cost of the house. 

You have to have the time and the inclination to fix it up. 

 3. You have to have enough money to fix a house up.

When you buy a DIY house, you have to ask yourself if you can spend $100,000 to do the necessary repairs. If the house is cheap enough, it might be worth it. You also have to have enough money to heat the place and pay the taxes. 

4. Projects that you can do yourself v. projects that you should pay professionals to do. 

Painting is really easy. Learn how to do it right. Make sure you take the time to tape up woodwork and spackle holes. Again this is really easy, and it will save you a ton of money if you do it yourself. Steve can also replace ceiling light fixtures. I'm good at refinishing wood. 

Most of these DIY homes can be made so much better with properly hung curtains and a good coat of paint. Getting rid of dusty ceiling fans is also a must. Pulling up overgrown shrubs and planting new ones is also really cheap and very easy to do. 

But there are other projects that ordinary mortals cannot do on their own. A new roof costs $14,000. A new bathroom costs $12,000, but we just put one in for $5,000. It's possible to go cheaper on bathrooms and kitchens if you know what you're doing. Also, contractors are cheap right now. 

Learn about plaster walls. When you want to put a nail in the wall, scotch tape the place first and then drill a hole. 

5. Projects that should be done right away. 

You have to deal with the invisible, but serious problems immediately. You'll know what the big problems are right away, because your bulldog inspector will give you all the bad news up front. The biggest enemy is water. It must be stopped. Leaky plumbing and a leaky roof have to be dealt with on day one or else you're looking at MAJOR problems. 

The floor must be dealt with right away, before your furniture gets in the front door. Refinish the floors or replace carpeting immediately. 

If you're planting new trees, put them in right away. They're inexpensive, but they need time to grow. You want to put them in at Year One, not Year Six. 

Replace ancient and inefficient appliances with something from Sears. 

You can't have your family living in a depressing place, so make it cheerful right away. Curtains from IKEA that are hung properly. My pet peeve is a curtain rod that is hammered into nice hardwood. You'll need to put a coat of paint everywhere. Bring in friends to help. It's also very inexpensive to have all your windows cleaned inside and out. 

Clean out the gutters. Your basement will thank you.

Some people will say to upgrade the electricity right away, but we never did it. As long as I don't run the hairdryer, a computer and an air conditioner at the same time, there are no problems. 

6. Projects that should be done last. 

Other than a few new trees and the new shrubs that you put in yourself, leave the curb appeal stuff for last. Who cares what the neighbors think? Fix the bathrooms, before you put on aluminum siding. 

Do not put in fancy kitchens or bathrooms immediately. All that granite and marble stuff is a waste of money in this housing market. Really. 

 

Housing Bubble Must Deflate Further

I look at this chart, and it makes me want to heave, as we were first time home owners in 2004. I blame grad school. If we hadn't wasted all that time getting a worthless degree, we could have had real jobs and bought earlier. Maybe if we sell now and rent for a year, we can stem the hemorrhage of cash. 

On the other hand, if you look at this dip in relation to the dip that occurred during the Great Depression, perhaps we can expect the prices to go back  up, when the economy improves. 

Entrance Way: Before and After

I'm thoroughly whooped from a morning of house cleaning. The agent is supposed to be here an hour to take pictures of the place. Hopefully, when she's done I can get back to work. I need to ease into the news of the day, blog, and then get my own writing down. While I'm waiting for her, I'll write a  house-y post. 

Here's the entrance way of the house, after we ripped out wood paneling, the carpet, and a closet that covered the window. Seven years ago. 

There's Dad pulling out nails from the rug. Hi Dad!

We found the original wallpaper under the fake wood paneling, and linoleum under the carpet. 

After the floors were sanded, it looked a little bit better. 

It still needed a lot of work. Last month, we did the last remaining jobs in the place. We stained the replacement rungs, patched the ceiling, and fixed the molding. Here it is now:

Believe it or not, we're actually going to lose a lot of money on this place. Le sigh.