My dad sits in his green winged back chair reading Cotton Mather. He announces, “I could use more coffee.” And, magically, a cup of black coffee appears. Well, not so magically. My mom has brought it into the livingroom for him.
“Mom!,” I shout. “He could get it himself.” Dad just giggles and returns to his reading. And mom smiles.
My mom really thinks that men are retarded. There is no point forcing my dad to take on all the chores around the house, because she’s convinced there is no way he could do it.
My husband’s aunt frequently sends me e-mails that have been forward a bazillion times through the internet. These e-mails recount all the work that women do and end with a note to hug another woman in your life or offer a prayer. Nothing about giving the guys a swift kick in the ass.
I think guys have evolved a bit in recent years. And women of my generation do expect the guys to pull their weight around the house more.
But when it comes to the kids, it is still women who bear most of the responsibility. It’s women who are responsible for finding the childcare, who fret about the morality of hiring nannies, who take days off when the kids are sick, who remember to buy the birthday cake, who attend other kid’s birthday parties, who sign the kids up for piano lessons, who go to Back to School night.
Steve took Jonah to his soccer game this Saturday. He noted that it was mostly mothers on the sideline.
It’s no wonder that women have the hardest time negotiating work and family. They have a greater share of family responsibilities.
Who sorts out the winter clothes in your house? Who buys the birthday presents? Who writes the thank you notes? Who organizes the photo album?