The Head of Boone

Last week, Jonah's teacher assigned a book report. He had to get a bibliography from the school library, fill in a worksheet about the book, and then render the likeness of this hero in styrofoam. She provided detailed description about how we had to secure a styrofoam ball onto a paper towel tube and then make clothes and accessories.

Of course, my space cadet son never came home with the book and completely blew past the deadline. Feeling somewhat guilty that my irresponsibility was being passed onto another generation, I lit a fire under his ass.

I drove around New Jersey for an hour looking for styrofoam balls, because I just don't have those things around the house. I unwound an entire roll of paper towels. I drove Jonah to the public library, because he managed to forget the book again. He wanted a book on Julius Caesar. No Caesar, but three books on the Backstreet Boys. Settled for Daniel Boone.

After dinner, we finally read the book and make the head of Boone.

It looks like an Abu Graib torture victim, doesn't it? It didn't help that when our backs were turned, Ian gouged a few holes in the head with the scissors.

Comments

[Macaroni]

Oh, my gosh it's Daniel Boone! He's so gorgeous! Kudos to Jonah!

[dave s]

I am myself astonished that it's already 3:00 in the afternoon and you haven't posted on today's Times oped by an admissions officer about her discrimination against girls in college admissions. I am working hard to keep my boys sufficiently on track and focused that, when the time comes, they could get admitted to college even if they were girls... and a large part of it is keeping them on track to do their assignments on time, tell us what's required, etc.
We have had a number of last-minute forced marches just like the one you describe.

[Laura]

the office furniture arrived today and everything is all higgly-wiggly. Four desks in one little room. I didn't even the chance to read the paper today. Bad blogger. Bad blogger. I'll post on it tonight after the special ed meeting.

[dave s]

and furthermore - Boone! Yeah! my boys are on a steady diet of Sojourner Truth and Susan B Anthony and Helen Keller and Harriet Tubman - they keep soldiering on, but it would help to have a Boone or Davy Crockett, or Frederick Douglass. Lincoln, they have heard about. Women hold up half the sky? As far as they can tell, women hold up 4/5 of the sky. Sacajawea is swell, but damnit, the expedition was in fact that of (dare I say it???) Lewis and Clark!