Carla brings up an interesting point. Is academia worse than other professional careers in terms of accomodating families? I believe it is.
You spend 7 to 10 years completing your studies. During that time you are earning little to no money, you are not accumulating social security, you probably are wracking up credit card bills and student loans, and you have no office experience. If you have to take off time to raise your kids, you have almost no hope of returning to your job. Your area of study will probably not directly carry over into another career. There are no part time opportunities.
My friend, Margie, has a degree in Ancient Near Eastern Inscriptions. A career that requires mastery of ancient inscriptions doesn't show up in the NYT classifieds all that often. She and I in our blacker moments wish that we had become secretaries in our twenties and had socked away some money before taking off time to be with the kids.
I have several friends on the tenure track with kids. I'm working on an article on this topic and one refused to be mentioned in the article even in vaguest possible way. She was afraid of retribution before tenure. Another maintains that her job was only possible because she had only one kid. Many have put off kids until their late thirties -- not recommended by the AMA.
